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There are some myths out there that people assume to be gospel about dating, especially among Christians.
Christian culture is like any other in that we develop truisms that we accept without verifying.
There are plenty of them, but let's focus on what I believe are the top five myths that make dating harder for Christian singles. There is plenty of stuff about God's will for his people, God wanting good things for you, and God's ultimate plan.
Nowhere, however, does it say that God picked out a spunky brunette whom he's waiting to spring on you at the right moment. When it comes to God, I'm pretty careful about saying what he does or doesn't do.
Regardless of your theology on the Predestination of Girlfriends, you're probably eager to be an active participant in your dating life. People didn't date in biblical times, there is no such thing as "Biblical Dating".
Dating as a socially accepted means of finding a mate has been around for less than a century.
Falling in love before you got married or engaged is a twentieth-century concept. In college, I had an older professor from Japan whose marriage had been arranged.
" (No, that wasn't a suggestion for you to set up an arranged marriage.) For the Hebrews and the early church, dating wasn't an issue to be addressed in Scripture. When the Bible was written, a person basically had one of three options: remaining single, an immoral life with multiple partners or prostitutes, or an arranged marriage.Rather than directing the course of the relationship, God wants the couple to grow and learn how to make a commitment.Once they've done that, God increases his sustaining presence.This may be the biggest excuse men use for being lazy in relationships, much less finding one.German theologian Dietrich Bonhoeffer addresses this issue in a wedding sermon he wrote for his sister from a Nazi jail cell.
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There are things floating around that have little or nothing to do with the Bible.